A lot of what we do as Client Services is about winning – whether it’s delivering epic creative on brief, smashing the profit margin on a project, or maybe just getting client praise. We as a bunch of people (God have mercy on us) are most likely to be people pleasers… it is why we are so good at our jobs.
But with the ability to win, will always come the possibility of losing – and it will happen. And it will happen more than once. It might even happen every week, or maybe just once a month, or if you’re lucky once a year, but the nature of what we do (tight deadlines, demanding clients, complex deliverables) means inevitably you will at some point need to apologise to a client.
And I am not talking about when clients scope creep or when they incorrectly inform you (those are mutual discussions to resolve) – I am talking about the “Oh fuck” moments. You know, the ones where the email comes in and there is a high importance flag on it, and the subject line has exclamation marks longer than the words, and the whole world seems to be cc in (and you know there are some sneaky ‘bbc’ too), and the whole body of the email seems to be written in red with underline in which they state that they are “concerned” and “confused” or worst of all… just “disappointed”.
I am talking about the client flag where your stomach instantly drops and you realise despite your best efforts you have made a mistake.
So I have been there (quite a few times) and I know it can be scary and overwhelming, and I know that we are all guilty of beating ourselves up about it (often more so than anyone else could which makes my job a lot easier!) so I just wanted to share my experience on it…
Firstly – step away from your machine.
Take 5 minutes to do whatever you need to do – cry in the toilets, punch puppies, smoke your first cigarette in a year or grab your desk buddy. Just spend a moment to realise it sucks and you/we/they fucked up.
Next – apologise.
It sounds so simple and obvious, and yet human nature will work against you on this one. Because we don’t like to admit fault; mostly because it hurts our pride and it makes us look inferior in these relationships.
Our job makes this even more complicated because we are essentially paid to deliver, and we build client relationships on trust of that delivery. We also have so many different client relationship types – those we emoji with, those we still only ‘kind regards’ and those who we give ourselves little motivational chats before we call them.
So the best advice I could give you on this:
Do not hide from it. I promise you it never ever works.
Just because they didn’t chase doesn’t mean they didn’t notice. If you are going to be late sending something tell them – because every time you have to do ‘minor apology’ for late cost plans or project deliverables it weakens the strength of your ‘important apologies’ and slowly chips away at their belief in your promises to deliver.
So tell them in advance “I hope it will not be an inconvenience but I am hoping I can send you the cost plan/creative/staging link on Friday as opposed to Thursday – please do let me know if this will cause any issues with timings your side and we can look to address.”
And if you find yourself constantly changing the goal posts then it’s time to assess if you/we are over promising or if we need to change our approach with that client.
Remember saying sorry may buy you time but it does come at a cost, even if it is not one you cannot have to pay short term.
Apologise in a way that suits the crime. Whilst it can sometimes seem like the end of the world to you and the client; I find it is always best to sanity check your punishment with someone else.
Natural instinct for some might be gushing self flagellation and to set yourself on fire, for others it might be a more comic brush over in a 90’s Hugh Grant style (… do you remember that?), and for some it might be a reluctant pay the blame forward approach.
And whilst it is so important that your apologies are honest and authentic to you – the style of them should also reflect the subject matter and the person on the receiving end.
So use your team to sanity check the level of response required, and then to also sanity check the final response.
A quick checklist I use:
Have I done 3 things (1) said sorry (2) admitted fault (3) proposed how rectify?
(1) Saying sorry
– Does the tone of the email match the tone I would usually send to this client?
– Does the level of sorry reflect the error and its consequences?
(2) Admitting fault
– Have I offered excuses? Are they ones that don’t concern the client? Are they in there just to make myself feel better? … Then remove them
– Have I offered someone else up as the cause? It is fair? Is it useful to the client relationship to do so? Will it cause doubt in areas of the business that we cannot afford i.e. the technical systems? studio teams? … I understand the urge to explain but be very careful where you place the blame, even when justified – it can sometimes be much easier to restore faith in you than in the multi million pound CMS holding up their infrastructure, Or the faceless creative team who support you
(3) Proposing how to rectify
– Be very clear on your solution, and remember it does not always have to be around fixing the mistake… sometimes mistakes cannot be undone and all you can do is detail everything you will do in the future to ensure it does not happen again (i.e. additional UAT, calendar reminders, flag systems)
– Be very wary of offering solutions you know in your heart you will not stick too however. In my experience people always remember if you promised it would not happen again and it is very difficult to re-build trust a second time. As a last resort my advice in regards to a mistake or error you think for whatever reason will recur (yes, likely because of Laurence) then simply apologise and move on as best you can
So when you finally (and don’t take too long – time is of the essence) have this well crafted apology response…ask yourself why aren’t you calling them
(or for the big ‘holy fuck we lost a database kind of fuckers’ going to see them).
Yes, saying sorry face-to-face is ten times more awkward.
Yes, you don’t have time for it you just need to get on.
Yes, you are worried if you don’t write it first you might mess it up.
And Yes, they would probably be happy with just an email.
But you know what…
No, they are unlikely to be assholes to your face or on the phone
(I cannot promise you the same on email, and I can actually assure you the opposite if you text. Carrier pigeon however still has a vintage charm about it – as does barbershop quartet – where fitting the client of course).
Sometimes we mess up, and in those times people are likely to send us shitty emails about it…but then they calm down and then we think of solutions. And that conversation does so much more for relationships when had as an actual conversation.
And here is where human nature will actually works in your favour – calling someone or seeing the person face to face lends itself to genuine empathy development. People usually soften because they can see or hear you are genuine and they will have compassion or at least an understanding for you.
Everyone knows it takes balls to apologise outside of the digital world – and if you fucked up, wouldn’t you at least like to be known for having the balls to deal with it like that.
I know I could live with that as the outcome for the days I fuck up.
And sometimes you won’t say sorry. And that is okay.
Sometimes you won’t believe you or the agency is at fault, and you might just think the client is bullying you into confessing. It is hopefully rare that your clients do this, but if you find yourself formulating apologies that you don’t mean then ask yourself this… ‘Are you actually sorry?’ If the answer is “no” then don’t apologise because it will be insincere and building a negative relationship which is dominated by the client. Just sanity check your decision with the team and then discuss how to respond in a constructive manner.
My only piece of advice being here is making sure you are not righting a wrong with another wrong. You have to have belief in the quality of your service, and sometimes (unfortunately) remember that the client is allowed a little more leeway with mistakes than we are.
I also always think it is worth remembering that
“Apologising doesn’t always mean you were wrong and the other person was right. Sometimes it is about valuing the relationship more than your ego.”
For me, I only fight the battles where the worth of winning is so much more than the risk of losing.
And finally, my last piece of advice is never be sorry alone.
Whether you share it as soon as it happens, or after you have prepared a response… the important thing is that you share. And that can be with the project team, or with your line manager or with your teammate; just share the pain.
As the lead client contact you may feel like the face of the mistake and carry its guilt, but sharing means you can sanity check your panic, it means other people can recommend the best approach, it means other people can learn from your mistakes and really it means when you are ready other people can send you punishing memes.
And remember, the person next to you made a mistake last week. And the person you admire most probably made one last month. And the person that leads you still remembers every single one they have made in 9 years at this agency…
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My first ever mistake
I don’t know if you always remember your first one (?) but I can remember mine. And whilst it was internal, rather than client facing, it still taught me a valuable lesson.
Fresh out of university and still a little bit Welsh, I was going on my first client lunch with Mr F. And I don’t remember what conversations led to this point but I remember so clearly meeting the client off the train in Guildford and David turning to me and saying “so where did you book lunch?”
My brain said ‘FUCK. WHAT.’, and I think my mouth just strung a long ‘ummmmm…’ and then a horrific excuse of “you never asked me too….”
I sweated more in those 10 seconds of silenced response than any HIIT Bodycoach session you could do.
David being the absolute Boss of course saved the day rather smoothly and 10 min’s later we were sitting down in Loch Fyne enjoying bubbles and muscles.
But the fear lives with me to this day and I will never agree to attend a client meeting without confirming with the client lead what is expected of me and if I need to book anything, bring anything or prepare anything.
And I guess my positive point in all this would be:
Don’t worry about making mistakes and having to apologise…
Just never apologise for the same thing twice; always make new mistakes
Because failing doesn’t mean you aren’t progressing – in fact failing at new things means you are trying and tomorrow you will be better for it!
Ad-woman 
